Career and Work

Leaders, Knowledge, and Power

“If a leader is to be effective, he or she must always be learning. I don’t mean just gaining knowledge about a subject, but knowledge about his or her people as well, what motivates and inspires them. The effective leader must watch, listen, and learn about the environment and the culture where they are operating. Knowledge truly is power. Recognizing and learning how to best use that knowledge is what makes a leader powerful.” – Greg Taunt

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Answering Email is Not Our Work

“Email should be something that helps our work, rather than a tool that controls us. I don’t want my tombstone to say: ‘Here lies Jocelyn K. Glei, she checked all her emails.’ It sounds a bit underwhelming doesn’t it?” – Jocelyn K. Glei

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Lighthouses Just Shine

“Lighthouses don’t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.” – Anne Lamott

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Use the Right Equipment

“When people ask what equipment I use, I tell them, ‘my eyes.'” – Ansel Adams

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Would You Rather

“If your company mission is to climb a tree, which would you rather do: hire a squirrel or train a horse?”

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Building Your Reputation

“You can’t build a reputation on what you’re going to do.” – Henry Ford

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Keeping Your Sanity (or Insanity) at Work

  • At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
  • Page yourself over the intercom. (Don’t disguise your voice.)
  • Insist that your e-mail address is Xena-goddess-of-fire@companyname.com or Elvis-the-King @companyname.com.
  • Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
  • Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair dancing.
  • Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “IN.”
  • Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
  • Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
  • Reply to everything someone says with, “That’s what you think.”
  • Finish all your sentences with, “…in accordance with the prophecy.”
  • Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights up the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way.
  • Dont use any punctuation
  • As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
  • Specify that your drive-through order is “to go.”
  • Sing along at the opera.
  • Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme.
  • Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you’re doing. For example: If anyone needs me, I’ll be in the bathroom.
  • Put mosquito netting around your cubicle.
  • Call the psychic hotline and just say, “Guess.”
  • When the money comes out of the ATM, scream, “I won! I won! Third time this week!!!”
  • When leaving the zoo, start running toward the parking lot yelling, “Run for your lives, they’re loose!”
  • Tell your boss, “It’s not the voices in my head that bother me, it’s the voices in your head that do”
  • Tell your children over dinner, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”
  • Every time you see a broom, yell, “Honey, your mother is here.”
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Worker Ants

The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a natural-history lesson. “Worker ants,” she told them, “can carry pieces of food five times their own weight. What do you conclude from that?”

One child was ready with the answer: “They don’t have a union.”

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Vacation Time

Jill had applied for a job and when she returned home, her mother asked how the interview went.

“Pretty good I think”, replied Jill, “but if I go to work there I won’t get a vacation unless I’m married.

Her mother of course, had never heard of such a thing and asked “Is that what they told you?

“No”, replied Jill, “they didn’t tell me that, but on the application it said, ‘Vacation time may not be taken until you’ve had your First Anniversary.’

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Because the Patient

Dedicated to all healthcare workers, both clinical and non-clinical…

  • Because the patient has a need, we have a job to do.
  • Because the patient has a choice, we must be the better choice.
  • Because the patient has sensibilities, we must be considerate.
  • Because the patient has urgency, we must be quick.
  • Because the patient is unique, we must be flexible.
  • Because the patient has high expectations, we must excel.
  • Because the patient has influence, we have the hope of more patients.
  • Because of the patient, we exist.
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