A Letter to the Pastor

Dear Pastor:

You often stress attendance at worship as being very important for a Christian, but I think a person has a right to miss now and then. I think every person ought to be excused for the following reasons and the number of times indicated:

  • Christmas (Sunday before or after)
  • New Year (Party lasted too long)
  • Easter (Get away for holidays)
  • July 4 (National holiday)
  • Labor Day (Need to get away)
  • Memorial Day (Visit hometown)
  • School Closing (Kids need break)
  • School Opens (One last fling)
  • Family Reunions (Mine & wife’s)
  • Sleep late (Saturday night parties)
  • Deaths in Family
  • Anniversary
  • Sickness (One per family member)
  • Business Trips (A must)
  • Vacation (Three weeks)
  • Bad Weather (Ice, snow, rain, clouds, heat wave)
  • Ball games
  • Unexpected Company (Can’t walk out)
  • Time changes (Spring ahead; fall back)
  • Special on TV (Super Bowl, etc.)

Pastor, that leaves only two Sundays per year. So, you can count on us to be in church on the fourth Sunday in February and the third Sunday in August unless providentially hindered.

Sincerely,

A Faithful Member

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