Ironic Word Play

  • You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish.
  • To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
  • When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
  • When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.
  • A will is a dead giveaway.
  • When you’ve seen one shopping Center you’ve seen a mall.
  • When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
  • Those who get too big for their pants will be exposed in the end.
  • A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
  • The batteries were given out free of charge.
  • A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.
  • A will is a dead giveaway.
  • With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
  • A boiled egg is hard to beat.
  • Police were called to the daycare center, where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
  • Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
  • A bicycle can’t stand alone; it is two tired.
  • The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.
  • He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
  • When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she’d dye.
  • Acupuncture is a job well done. That’s the point of it.

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