“Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian.” – Dennis Wholey
Newspaper Bloopers
Dr. Benjamin Porter visited the school yesterday and lectured on “Destructive Pests.” A large number were present.
The sewer expansion project is nearing completion but City officials are holding their breath until it is officially finished.
The ladies of the county medical society auxiliary plan to publish a cookbook. Part of the money will go to the Samaritan Hospital to purchase a stomach pump.
Columbia, Tennessee, which calls itself the largest outdoor mule market in the world, held a mule parade yesterday headed by the Governor.
The assembly passed and sent to the senate a bill requiring dog owners in New York City to clean up after their dogs, in penalty of $100 fine. The bill also applies to Buffalo.
The attorney general’s office said yesterday that an autopsy performed on the headless body of a man found in Mason failed to determine the cause of death.
The bride-elect was showered with pieces of her chosen china.
Weather: Sunny with a few cloudy periods today and Thursday, which will be followed by Friday.
The women included their husbands and their children in their potluck suppers.
The bride was wearing an old lace gown that fell to the floor as she came down the aisle.
A Computer Poem for People Over 40
A computer was something on TV, From a science-fiction show of note, A window was something you hated to clean, And ram was the cousin of a goat.
Meg was the name of my girlfriend, And gig was a job for the nights, Now they all mean different things, And that really mega bytes.
An application was for employment, A program was a TV show, A cursor used profanity, A keyboard was a piano.
Log on was adding wood to the fire, Hard drive was a long trip on the road, A mouse pad was where a mouse lived, and backup happened to your commode.
Cut you did with a pocket knife, And paste you did with glue, A web was a spider’s home, And a virus was a flu.
I guess I’ll stick to my pad and paper, And the memory in my head, I hear nobody’s been killed in a computer crash, But when it happens they wish they were dead.