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2,600+ inspiring quotes, stories and more - Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel Your Flame
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New Windows Pay For Themselves

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on November 2, 2020 by GregNovember 2, 2020

You know this has to have happened sometime…

“Last year, I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive, double-pane, energy-efficient kind. Today, I got a call from the contractor who installed them.

He complained that the work had been completed a year ago. and I still hadn’t paid for them.

Hellloooo… I told him just what his fast-talking sales guy told me last year – that these windows would pay for themselves in a year. Well, it’s been a year, so they’re paid for, I told him.

There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally hung up. He never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.”

Seriously, you know this has had to have happened…

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Posted in Thought Provokers | Tagged Communication, Finance and Money

Our Limits

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on November 1, 2020 by GregNovember 1, 2020

“May I see my own limits with compassion, just as I view the limits of others.” – Roshi Joan Halifax

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Posted in The Book of Taunt | Tagged Life, Mind and Attitude

Fun With the English Language

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on November 1, 2020 by GregNovember 1, 2020

English is such an interesting and unique language:

  1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
  2. The farm was used to produce produce.
  3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
  4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
  5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
  6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
  7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
  8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum
  9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
  10. I did not object to the object.
  11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
  12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
  13. They were too close to the door to close it.
  14. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
  15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
  16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
  17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail
  18. After a number of injections my jaw got number.
  19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
  20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests
  21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

 

And there’s more:

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France -surprise! Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.

Quicksand works slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham?

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese?

Doesn’t it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend. If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd, or an end?

If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? (Does that mean you are upside down?)

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. P.S. – Why doesn’t “Buick” rhyme with “quick”?

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Posted in Thought Provokers | Tagged Communication, Facts and Figures, Fun and Games

Convicted by Silence

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on October 31, 2020 by GregOctober 31, 2020

“Correct with kindness and love but also with zeal and holy freedom. If you do not speak out, if you do not sound the alarm when it is needed, you will be justly convicted by your silence.” – St. Mary Euphrasia

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Posted in The Book of Taunt | Tagged Choices and Decisions, Communication, Heart and Caring, Leadership, Life, Mind and Attitude, Soul and Christianity

Do What You Do Well

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on October 31, 2020 by GregOctober 31, 2020

“Do what you do so well that they will want to see it again and bring their friends.” – Walt Disney

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Posted in The Book of Taunt | Tagged Choices and Decisions, Friendship and Relationships, Success and Failure

Common Sense and Wisdom

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on October 30, 2020 by GregOctober 30, 2020

“Common Sense in an uncommon degree is what the world calls wisdom.”

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Posted in The Book of Taunt | Tagged Life, Mind and Attitude

Become a Hunter of Blessings

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on October 30, 2020 by GregOctober 30, 2020

“Become a hunter of blessings, actively seeking them out in every experience and person you encounter.” – Kate Nowak

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Posted in The Book of Taunt | Tagged Choices and Decisions, Mind and Attitude, Soul and Christianity, Success and Failure

Defining Our Lives

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on October 29, 2020 by GregOctober 29, 2020

“Our lives are defined by the choices we make.”

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Posted in The Book of Taunt | Tagged Life

A Blessing or a Curse

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on October 29, 2020 by GregOctober 29, 2020

“We determine whether something will be a blessing or a curse by the way we choose to see it.” – Kate Nowak

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Posted in The Book of Taunt | Tagged Choices and Decisions, Heart and Caring, Life, Soul and Christianity, Success and Failure

Excellence is a Habit

Tauntisms.com - Inspiration and Encouragement | Keep Your Cool | Live on Fire | Fuel the Flame Posted on October 28, 2020 by GregOctober 28, 2020

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” – Aristotle

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Posted in The Book of Taunt | Tagged Choices and Decisions, Leadership, Success and Failure

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