“I can’t afford to hate people. I don’t have that kind of time.” – Bob Ross
It’s Your Move
Invent the Future
Successful People Ask the Right Questions
Where There’s Manure…
There were once two identical twins. They were alike in every way but one. One was a hope-filled optimist who only ever saw the bright side of life. The other was a dark pessimist, who only ever saw the down side in every situation.
The parents were so worried about the extremes of optimism and pessimism in their boys they took them to the Doctor. He suggested a plan. “On their next birthday give the pessimist a shiny new bike, but give the optimist only a pile of manure.”
It seemed a fairly extreme thing to do. After all the parents had always treated heir boys equally. But in this instance they decided to try to Doctor’s advice. So when the twins birthday came round they gave the pessimist the most expensive, top of the range, racing bike a child has ever owned. When he saw the bike his first words were, “I’ll probably crash and break my leg.”
To the optimist they gave a carefully wrapped box of manure. He opened it, looked puzzled for a moment, then ran outside screaming, “You can’t fool me! Where there’s this much manure, there’s just gotta be a pony around here somewhere!”
Plans are Guesses
Grudges and Forgiveness
Let Us Dance
“We did not ask for this room or this music; we were invited in. Therefore, because the dark surrounds us, let us turn our faces toward the light. Let us endure hardship to be grateful for plenty… We did not ask for this room or this music. But because we are here, let us dance.” – Stephen King
Medical Secretary Typos
We all make mistakes and for several medical secretaries, what they typed didn’t quite explain the actual situation…
- Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital.
- Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
- Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
- Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Jones, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
- The patient refused autopsy.
- She is numb from her toes down.
- She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
- Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.
- Skin: somewhat pale, but present.
- Patient was found in bed with her power mower.
