“Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence wins championships.” – Michael Jordan
Don’t Mess with the Elderly
An elderly couple returned to a Mercedes dealership to find the salesman had just sold the car they were interested in to a beautiful blonde girl.
“I thought you said you would hold that car until we raised the $75,000 asking price,” said the man. “Yet, I just heard you closed the deal for $65,000 to that lovely lady there. You insisted there could be no discount on this model.”
“Well, what can I tell you? She had the cash ready and just look at her, how could I resist?” replied the grinning salesman.
“Just then, the young woman approached the old folks and handed them the keys. “There you go,” she said. “I told you I could get this joker to drop the price. See you later grandpa.”
Never mess with the elderly.
Questions for Reference Librarians
These are actual questions that were asked of Reference Librarians in America and Canada (and you think your job is rough):
- “Do you have books here?”
- “Do you have a list of all the books written in the English language?”
- “Do you have a list of all the books I’ve ever read?”
- “Where is the reference desk?” This was asked of a person sitting at a desk who had, hanging above her head, a sign saying “REFERENCE DESK”!
- “I was here about three weeks ago looking at a cookbook that cost $39.95. Do you know which one it is?”
- “Which outlets in the library are appropriate for my hairdryer?”
- “Can you tell me why so many famous Civil War battles were fought on National Park sites?”
- “Do you have any books with photographs of dinosaurs?”
- “I need a color photograph of George Washington [Christopher Columbus, King Arthur, Moses, Socrates, etc.]”
- “I need a photocopy of Booker T. Washington’s birth certificate.”
- “I need to find out Ibid’s first name for my bibliography.”
- “Why don’t you have any books by Ibid? He’s written a lot of important stuff.”
- “I’m looking for information on carpal tunnel syndrome. I think I’m having trouble with it in my neck.”
- “Is the basement upstairs?” (Asked at First Floor Reference Desk)
- “I am looking for a list of laws that I can break that would send me back to jail for a couple of months.”
Thou Shalt Not Kill
I always thought there’s one commandment that Moses brought down from the mountain that I could never break:
THOU SHALT NOT KILL.
Inconceivable that I would use a gun, a knife, my bare hands, or anything to actually kill someone!
But, what about…
- killing someone’s joy or enthusiasm?
- killing someone’s faith in himself, herself, or others?
- killing someone’s spirit?
- killing their reputation?
- killing their hopes or dreams?
Not a gun or a knife, but a look, a snicker, a comment, or a lack of comment. Killing with a ball point pen or a sharp tongue…
It may take them 37 or 53 years to die, but they had been killed already.