A man complains to a friend, “I can’t take it anymore.” “What’s wrong?” his concerned friend asks. “It’s my wife. Every time we have an argument, she gets historical!” “You mean hysterical,” his friend said, chuckling. “No, I mean HISTORICAL,” … Continue reading →
The youth director had been trying for months to get the little boy down the street to come to church to be with his third grade Sunday school class. Finally after talking to the boy and his mother for what … Continue reading →
See if you can read this: Olny srmat poelpe can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch sudty at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer … Continue reading →
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn’t paying attention in class. She called on him and said, “Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?” Little Johnny quickly replied, “NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!”
Continue reading →What do you call a blind reindeer? I have no eye deer. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite. What do you call an elf that can sing and dance? Elfis. How do sheep … Continue reading →
The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a natural-history lesson. “Worker ants,” she told them, “can carry pieces of food five times their own weight. What do you conclude from that?” One child was ready with the answer: “They … Continue reading →
You’ve heard of Murphy’s famous Law: Everything that can go wrong will go wrong. Well, there are many other related Laws. Here are some: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch. –Lorenz’s Law of … Continue reading →
A young man was sitting next to me in one of the two “husband chairs” in a ladies’ clothing store. After 30 minutes and five outfits, the fellow’s wife came out of the change room again. He looked at her … Continue reading →
Even though I huddle in my bed and put off rising, thank you Lord, that I have the strength to rise. There are many who are bedridden. Even though the first hour of my day is hectic, when socks are … Continue reading →
This person: Was born in 1809. Failed in business in 1831. Lost election for state legislature in 1832. Failed again in business in 1834. Suffered through his sweetheart dying in 1835. Had a Nervous breakdown in 1836. Lost second political … Continue reading →