Scientists built a gun specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets, and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea was to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of … Continue reading →
A doting father used to sing his little children to sleep until he overheard the four-year-old tell the three-year-old, “If you pretend you’re asleep, he stops.”
Continue reading →10. “You know you’re the only one for me!” 9. “Do you come here often?” 8. “Trust me, this was meant to be!” 7. “Look around, baby. All the other guys around here are animals!” 6. “I already feel like … Continue reading →
There is a knock on St. Peter’s door. He looks out and a man is standing there. St. Peter is about to begin his interview when the man disappears. A short time later there’s another knock. St. Peter gets the … Continue reading →
As I was driving home from work one day, I stopped to watch a local Little League baseball game that was being played in a park near my home. I sat down behind the bench on the first-base line and … Continue reading →
We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the ‘seniors’ special’ was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $2.99. ‘Sounds good,’ my wife said. ‘But I don’t want the eggs.’ ‘Then, I’ll have to charge you three dollars … Continue reading →
The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet: The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to … Continue reading →
Tommy had reached school age. His mother managed with a blast of propaganda to make him enthusiastic about the idea. She bought him lots of new clothes, told him of the new friends he’d meet and so on. On the … Continue reading →
Arnold Schwartzenegger has a big one. Michael J. Fox has a small one. Madonna doesn’t have one. The Pope has one, but doesn’t use his. Bill Clinton uses his all the time. Mickey Mouse has an unusual one. George Burns’ … Continue reading →
Before I was a Mom, I made and ate hot meals. I had unstained clothing. I had quiet conversations on the phone. Before I was a Mom, I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late … Continue reading →