Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family. Dinner Special — Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00. For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers. Now is your chance … Continue reading →
The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. “What are you doing out here at 2:00 in the … Continue reading →
I asked God, “Why are you taking me through troubled water?” He replied, “Because your enemies can’t swim.”
Continue reading →God, grant me the Serenity To accept the things I cannot change… Courage to change the things I can, And Wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, Enjoying one moment at a time, Accepting hardship as the … Continue reading →
Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. While he’s in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket. Leave … Continue reading →
One day, a man went to visit a church. He arrived early, parked his car, and got out. Another car pulled up near him, and the driver told him, “I always park there. You took my place!” The visitor went … Continue reading →
I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with … Continue reading →
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women’s locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and … Continue reading →
Someone gave a speech this week about how his faith is “important” to him. In this attempt to convince the American people that we should consider him for president, he announced that his favorite Bible verse is John 16:3. Of … Continue reading →
Dear Pastor: You often stress attendance at worship as being very important for a Christian, but I think a person has a right to miss now and then. I think every person ought to be excused for the following reasons … Continue reading →